By Stephen Martin

My eight-year-old son’s greatest pleasure at the dinner table lately can be summed up with one word: belching. My mom always cringed when my brother or I did the same growing up. Now I’m beginning to see her side of things.

Take this recent scene from my house, during what had been a relatively civil meal:

Son: (suddenly issues a resounding belch)
5-year-old daughter: That’s so nasty!
Wife: (says nothing, silently clutches her head)
Me: C’mon man, that’s gotta stop. That was really egregious.
Son: What’s egregious mean?
Me (an English major who likes to throw around big words): It’s when you take something too far. You know, when you go to extremes.
Son: (nods, belches again even louder)
Me: Now what did I just say? That’s totally egregious!

I’m a big believer in the importance of living in what I like to call the ‘margins’ – those hidden places in ourselves and the wider world that jolt us out of our comfort zones when we make an effort to explore them. Because getting out of our comfort zones is a great way to grow.

There are extraordinary examples of living in the margins, like Mother Teresa. One moment, she’s an obscure school teacher taking a train ride in India. The next, she experiences a vision that convinces her to work directly with the poorest of the country’s poor. It’s a job so daunting and dangerous she can barely persuade her superiors to let her try it. We know what happened from there.

And then there are less dramatic instances that happen every day– but can be equally transformative for the people experiencing them.  Raising a family. Moving somewhere new. Running a 5K. Dealing with an illness or confronting a tough challenge in prayer or reaching out to a neighbor you don’t especially like.

The specifics of the margins we embrace don’t matter; what matters is that we are willing to let them shake up our lives a little. When you’ve finally settled into a strange town or made an unlikely friend or finished a race you never thought you could run, you should celebrate. Be proud of yourself. Take some time to let it soak in. Just remember: it’s not the margins anymore if it’s not making you a little queasy. You need to find new ones.

Asking yourself the following questions and thinking seriously about the answers can help:

1. How might I push myself physically? A dozen years ago, I didn’t exercise at all. Gradually, regular runs became part of my routine. Then I stepped it up a little, adding in weightlifting. Now I’m trying (so far a bit unsuccessfully!) to work tennis into the rotation.
2. What can I do to challenge myself spiritually? There was a time during my bachelor days when this meant simply getting myself to church at all. For many years now, however, weekly Mass has been the norm for me and my family. To keep growing, I’ve started working occasionally with a spiritual director who is challenging me to approach prayer in new ways.
3. How can I stretch myself emotionally? I’m an introverted guy who generally likes to keep his thoughts and feelings to himself – and prefers for everybody else to do the same.  This, of course, is not a great way to deepen relationships with those who matter to us most. Over the past year, I’ve made a concerted effort to really communicate with close family members and friends more frequently and more openly.

It’s not always bad to push your limits. Despite what I’m telling my kids now, you might just short-change yourself if you don’t.

—

Stephen Martin is a speechwriter and journalist who blogs at MessyQuest.com. His first book The Messy Quest for Meaning: Five Catholic Practices for Finding Your Vocation, was just released by Sorin Books.

Today, as part of the Catholic Family Fun Book Tour, it’s an honor to be to guest posting at The Practicing Catholic, where I’m sharing “Beyond the Pew: Being Catholic in the Rest of Our Lives.”

When I’m standing in front of the room of fifth-graders, grabbing their attention from the arm wrestling or fashion talk with captivating tales of adventure, it’s easy to be Catholic.

When I’m sharing with another mom why I value spiritual direction so much, it’s easy to be Catholic.

When I’m penning an article or writing a blog post, it’s easy to be Catholic.

And then there’s the REST of my life.

Read the rest at The Practicing Catholic.

I’m a big fan of our local pharmacy. The owners are parishioners at our church, and I’ve gotten to know them through my work in the parish office and in the community.

They’re great people, and the wife, Robin, is a writer.

She’s also an animal lover, and in her review of Catholic Family Fun on the Plain City Druggist blog, she shares some great ideas and approaches for integrating animals into family fun.

I especially loved, how after she wrote a few paragraphs of ideas and resources, Robin wrote,

…I was having way too much fun thinking of ways for children to also have fun while learning about and helping animals! Sarah’s book inspired me so much that I’ve spent a lovely morning at the keyboard daydreaming and having my own kind of fun! Thanks, Sarah! I think this is exactly what Catholic Family Fun is meant to do–inspire us all!

That makes me smile, because yes, that is what Catholic Family Fun is meant to do!

Note: I’m making this post sticky so it stays at the top of the blog at least for today and tomorrow. New posts will appear below it.

Around the house: The girls are up and watching some early morning TV curled under blankets. My boys are sleeping. The washer’s at work across the room and I’m thinking of what I need to do this morning.

In other places:

• A column I wrote for Pauline’s e-newsletter, “A How-To Guide for Catholic Family Fun” just went live.
• Steven McEvoy’s interview of me is up at Catholic Dads Online. It includes my answers to questions such as “When did you know you wanted to be a writer?” and “What does your typical day or week look like?” and an assortment of other questions about writing and reading and life.
• This week, I had some of the most fun I’ve had ever on a podcast. The folks at The FlagShip Galley Table invited me on and wow! I hope they invite me back! Listen to the great conversation about faith in fiction and you’ll find out what NOT to EVER put on a pizza.

In my kitchen: The floor is clean. And now the formerly quiet kids are demanding I make them breakfast. (They know about the stash of new flavors of Pop Tarts.)

In my thoughts: I’m thinking about a fun weekend visit, all I need to do in the coming week, and a host of things I’m grateful for.

In thanksgiving: For the support and encouragement of my family, for the weekly renewal of things horsey, for the weekend ahead.

In my prayers: A very special intention for someone I love dearly and a friend who’s mourning.

Nose inserted: Oh, these are goooood; it was all I could do to go to bed last night!

• Catching Fire, by Suzanne Collins (fiction, YA)
• Wish You Were Here: Travels through Loss and Hope, by Amy Welborn
• Walking with God: A Journey through the Bible, by Tim Gray and Jeff Cavins – which I’m using for morning devotional time

Recent reads: I’ll be reviewing a number of these very soon in various places.

• The Hunger Games, by Suzanne Collins (fiction, YA) – I read this because my sister-in-law asked me to, and I was rather surprised that I enjoyed it and even wanted to read the next book in the trilogy. My nieces have started reading it, and one of them told me that the movie is the BEST MOVIE EVER (she’s seen it twice and offered to go with me). I haven’t put my thoughts together coherently, but my early thoughts are that it’s almost like Lord of the Flies meets 1984.
• Style, Sex, and Substance: 10 Catholic Women Consider the Things that Really Matter, Edited by Hallie Lord – Fun and informative, lovely and hilarious, this is sure to warrant the hype it’s gotten and earn it’s spot as a best-selling Catholic book. I’m reviewing it in length at CatholicMom.com next Friday AND giving a copy away. Stay tuned!
• The Catholic Girl’s Survival Guide for the Single Years: The Nuts and Bolts of Staying Sane and Happy While Waiting for Mr. Right, by Emily Stimpson – I met the author at the Behold Conference, and I’ve enjoyed her writing online in various places, so I thought that, although the book didn’t appear to be anything relevant to me, I’d give it a shot. I couldn’t have been more wrong! Not only was it speaking to ME in many ways, but I marked passages and will be sharing more thoughts about it at length. One of the best books I’ve read in a long time, and I don’t say that lightly! I couldn’t put it down!
• The Work of Mercy: Being the Hands and Heart of Christ, by Mark Shea – I thought this book would be a drag, but I love Mark Shea’s writing and I thought I’d make it through it. What a delight to find that this book is the sort of thing I encourage our pastor to use for his Bible study, that I pass on to a good friend, and that I plan to reference and reread many times. Shea made the works of mercy so clear and so relevant that I found myself moved in ways I just never have been. It was touching, even as it was informative. In other words, I loved it.
• Fatherless, by Brian Gail – I picked this up reading all the acclaim and rave reviews about it and was really looking forward to it. After all, it’s Catholic fiction. However, I gave it three stars and found myself a bit disappointed. The story does keep moving and there are many parts that are compelling and thought-provoking. I had the sensation of being a bit preached to throughout, and I felt like it could have been about half as long and twice as effective. Nevertheless, I’ll be reading the other two books in the series (Motherless and Childless), so don’t think I didn’t enjoy reading it enough to continue. Three stars doesn’t make it a must-read in my categorizing, but it is worthwhile and better than drivel.
• Faith at Work: Finding Purpose Beyond the Paycheck, by Kevin Lowry – This is a great book, hands down. Kevin Lowry is approachable and I found that, though he wrote what is undoubtedly a business book, it’s applicable to all of us who work, whether we work at home or in an office or on the road. Lowry taps into his experience and his wisdom, shares his faith and his insight, and tops it all off with a bit of humor and perspective. I really enjoyed reading it and I will be encouraging others to read it as well.

Plea for advice: Anyone have suggestions for sharing links that isn’t FriendFeed? I thought it was going to be a great way to share in my sidebar, but I’ve caught that it’s been dropping the ball. If you have suggestions, I’m all ears!

A favorite thing: My seven-year-old’s penchant for coloring and the many beautiful drawings she is always making.

Food for thought: “Fasting, which can have various motivations, takes on a profoundly religious significance for the Christian: by rendering our table poorer, we learn to overcome selfishness in order to live in the logic of gift and love; by bearing some form of deprivation – and not just what is in excess – we learn to look away from our “ego”, to discover Someone close to us and to recognize God in the face of so many brothers and sisters. For Christians, fasting, far from being depressing, opens us ever more to God and to the needs of others, thus allowing love of God to become also love of our neighbor (cf. Mk 12: 31).” – Pope Benedict XVI, from his 2011 Lenten message

Worth a thousand words: My boy, who spent at least a half-hour a few mornings ago on the front porch, watching the traffic and pointing to all the trucks

Don’t miss your chance to win a copy of The Mighty Macs!

When I received my copy of The Mighty Macs, I thought my husband and I would curl up and watch it together.

I didn’t plan on the way March Madness would, well, take over our TV and our discretionary evening time.

And so, despite my best intention, I ended up watching it with my two girls, ages seven and four, during a recent movie night.

They all but dribbled their way to bedtime when it was over. Once in bed, my seven-year-old sat up suddenly.

“Was that based on a real story, Mom?”

“Yes, honey, it was.”

“So that REALLY happened?”

“Well, it’s a movie and so they probably changed a few things, but yes, it happened.”

She laid back down, her eyes alight. I knew just how she felt.

Just three days after watching it the first time, my seven-year-old was asking to watch it again.

“It was SO GOOD, Mom!”

“Yeah,” the four-year-old piped in, “we wanna play BASKETBALL!”

In my house, basketball is an aspiration. My husband and his little brother were both big into playing basketball and were very talented on the court. When he was a young boy, my husband used to tell his family that he wanted enough kids to have his own basketball team.

My girls know better than to ask Daddy to change the channel when basketball’s on, though he’s happy to have them snuggle with him and he’ll explain everything to them for as long as they’ll listen.

The Mighty Macs is not only a great family movie–rated G!–but it’s an inspirational account of what’s possible. I remember watching Rudy years ago and I still get shivers just thinking about it. Now there’s another movie in this category for me, and one that I’ve shared with my daughters.

This is a great story. The nuns had color to their character and the plot tension was palpable in a few places. It was well told and I’m sure we’ll be watching it again and again and again.

I’m not great at knowing all the elements of a good movie, but I know what we like, and The Mighty Macs fits the bill.

Want your own copy?

In honor of March Madness and my team making it to the Final Four, I’m giving away three copies of The Mighty Macs.

You can enter a few different ways (and more than once, too):

1. Leave a comment with your prediction of who’s going to be in the championship game.

(This part of the contest is only open until March 31, 5 PM Eastern. Any prediction comments left after that point will be disqualified from entry and deleted.)

2. Share your favorite sports movie in the comments.

The contest is open until Monday, April 2, 5 PM Eastern.

I’ll draw winners and announce them next Wednesday.

In case you were wondering how I feel about the championship game…GO BUCKS!

* * *

This contest is now over & comments are closed.

— 1 —

As you read this, I’m probably on my way over to the Behold Conference.

Not to brag, mind you, but I am a LOT excited.

I’m going to be spending a LOT of time with Elizabeth Duffy and Mrs. Darwin. I also plan to harass pursue follow around like a puppy dog see Danielle Bean, Jennifer Fulwiler, Hallie Lord, Arwen Mosher, Kate Wicker, and many, many more of my favorite online friends.

Hoo boy!

— 2 —

In the latest Catholic Foodie, Jeff’s talking fishy Fridays, and I’m sharing a Mary in the Kitchen that reflects on just why Lenten failures are good for me, every single year.

On the newest iPadre, Fr. Jay Finelli is awesome, as usual, and I’m on with a Mary Moment that’s B16-inspired.

— 3 —

Got a new iPod, iPad, or iPhone? I share my 13 Essential Catholic Apps in this week’s Tech Talk at CatholicMom.com.

Got a few minutes to talk New Evangelization with me? Over at New Evangelizers, I’m talking about how we’re all in this together.

— 4 —

You’ve probably long suspected there’s something “not quite right” about someone who names the voices in her head. But did you know I have multiple personalities online too? I talk about my dilemma over at the Catholic Writers Guild blog this week. If you have ideas for how I can reconcile myself…well, I’m all ears/eyes.

— 5 —

“Would you review my new book, Getting #Married: Using Social Media to Celebrate the Sacred?”

I was too curious to say no when the request came into my inbox.

For one thing, I think very highly of Meredith Gould, who is an author, a blogger, and one of my favorite people to follow on Twitter.

For another, when you put both “social media” and “sacred” in the subtitle, it makes for irresistibility as far as I’m concerned.

Read my review over at CatholicMom.com.

— 6 —

I’ve been tempted to start posting links to our priest’s homilies here on my blog. He’s such a talented homilist–he can say more in seven minutes than I can say in a half-hour. Last weekend, his homily inspired a whole column idea for me, among other things. (I need to listen to it a third time to get all my notes down so I can bug him with my uber-nerdy theology questions.)

— 7 —

This is a classic case of saving the best for last, don’t you think?

Visit Conversion Diary for more Quick Takes!

— 1 —

Less than a month until we can all have our hands on this:

Join me in a happy dance, will you?

It’s not available yet for pre-order, but just as soon as it is, I’ll be sure to let you know!

— 2 —

Have you seen the great work Greg and Jennifer Willits are doing over at New Evangelizers? I have meant to mention it, and I never have. (Bad me.)

As it turns out, I’m now writing there weekly, about the New Evangelization. I’m finding this to be a topic that, like so many other topics I’ve started writing about, turns out to be FAR BIGGER than I imagined in the beginning.

My first post, “In the Silence of the Internet,” starts with a plug for the Pope’s message for World Communications Day and then a few words about how the internet inspires silence in me.

The Pope’s Message for the 46th World Communications Day has struck a deep chord with me and it speaks to each of us who are involved in spreading our Catholic faith.

For one thing, there’s the title: “Silence and Word: Path of Evangelization.”

In my years of interacting on the interwebs, there is silence of a sort, at least when I’m not yelling at my screen or ranting about what some fool (whose name may or may not be Sarah Reinhard) has said or done.

Continue reading at New Evangelizers –>

— 3 —

In my Mary Moment on iPadre this week, I share how Mary Poppins inspired me to think about Mama Mary.

In case you want to hum along with me, here you go:

— 4 —

At CatholicMom.com this week, I’m talking tech with an idea I have for an app that would take off like wildfire. Or not. Anyway, if you’re curious, you can read it and let me know what you think.

I also share a detailed review of the collection of Chesterton essays I mentioned on earlier this week.

— 5 —

I don’t really have a good entry at the Catholic Writers Guild blog this week, though I do open it up for questions (no takers so far). If you head over there, check out the other good stuff…I really liked Ebeth Weidner’s piece on tending the garden and learned quite a bit about developing theme from a writer’s standpoint from Leslie Lynch. (I may write nonfiction, but wow! I learn so much from my fiction writing friends!)

Those are just the things that went up THIS week. If you have an interest in writing, I highly recommend at least following that blog…and why not consider a membership to CWG?

Hoping to see you at the Catholic Writers Conference Online later this month, too! (Registration is closed now. And wow, it’s going to be a great and intimate group this year!)

— 6 —

I found this bit of awesomeness via Danielle Bean. I have shown it to everyone I can think of, but whether you have seen it yet or not, I MUST post it on my blog. MUST.

See why?

— 7 —

I’m pretty sure this is one of my all-time favorite pictures of my girls:

Yes, my four-year-old is now riding by herself unassisted! She takes lessons, too. A year sooner than her sister. By our calculations, that means the mancub (who is 16-months-old!) will be riding at age three.

I took this picture to show how tall my seven-year-old’s horse was next to the pony my four-year-old rides.

Have a good weekend!

Be sure to stop by Conversion Diary for more Quick Takes and lots of goodness!

— 1 (Be Proud of Me) —

Yeah, I know. It’s not Friday. The temptation was strong to do two posts yesterday, but aren’t you proud of me? I resisted!

So here I am on Saturday with some Quickish Takes…

— 2 (Book Giveaway Winners) —

If you entered my book giveaway this month, I announced winners the other day and also sent emails (though I have a good hearty appreciation for spam filters, indeed I do).

Be sure you contact me if you won!

— 3 (Papa Rocks!) —

Have you read the pope’s message for Lent 2012 yet? How’d I not find it until now? Here’s a sampling:

The Lenten season offers us once again an opportunity to reflect upon the very heart of Christian life: charity. This is a favourable time to renew our journey of faith, both as individuals and as a community, with the help of the word of God and the sacraments. This journey is one marked by prayer and sharing, silence and fasting, in anticipation of the joy of Easter.

This year I would like to propose a few thoughts in the light of a brief biblical passage drawn from the Letter to the Hebrews:“ Let us be concerned for each other, to stir a response in love and good works”. These words are part of a passage in which the sacred author exhorts us to trust in Jesus Christ as the High Priest who has won us forgiveness and opened up a pathway to God. Embracing Christ bears fruit in a life structured by the three theological virtues: it means approaching the Lord “sincere in heart and filled with faith” (v. 22), keeping firm “in the hope we profess” (v. 23) and ever mindful of living a life of “love and good works” (v. 24) together with our brothers and sisters.

Go read the whole thing.

— 4 (Hearts to Celeste) —

Here’s a great Lenten resource, courtesy of Celeste Behe: 40 for 12.

Throughout the 40 days of Lent, the 40 for 12 Menu Plan will offer a weekly shopping list and menu of meatless meals, along with easy recipes and fun commentary. Each of the recipes is designed to serve 12, in order to suit big happy families with many mouths to feed, small happy families with voracious teens, and prudent wives who know the value of a good leftover.

Here’s the bottom line of this 40 for 12 Menu Plan brilliance:

• Living out the Lenten discipline of abstinence as a family
• Free Mom from undue stress
• Keep kids from being sullen
• Recipes serve big families OR have plenty of leftovers
• Plans can be modified easily
• There aren’t expensive convenience foods
• Shopping lists included!
• Do I really need to go on? Aren’t you SOLD?

Something to help me spend less time in the kitchen? Well, Celeste, let me hug you!

— 5 (My Other Blatherings) —

Total excitement: my interview made the podcast version of The Catholics Next Door. So if, like me, you don’t listen to Sirius/XM (but you long to, if only to hear the awesomeness that is Greg and Jennifer Willits), then you can hear my recent interview.

More excitement: I’m now a contributor over at the Integrated Catholic Life. My first column, “My Reckless Experiment with Fridays” went live yesterday.

Lenten failures: I’m on iPadre this week with a Mary Moment about my Lenten failures.

I love pizza, need I say more? On Catholic Foodie, Mary in the Kitchen is pizza-oriented (after a fun-filled parade-induced show).

Did you know there’s a great new app for Total Consecration? It gets my rave review over in my Tech Talk column this week at CatholicMom.com.

Lent’s on my mind: I’m talking Lent and blogging at the Catholic Writers Guild this week.

— 6 (Share Your Story) —

Do you have a Lenten story about how you’ve grown? Is there a faith story you’d be willing to share with others?

Karina Fabian is collecting them at the Why God Matters website. Here’s the scoop:

In 1996, Karina Fabian, mother of toddlers, made a Lenten vow that launched her career as a writer.  Years later, it led her to share that joy of writing with her father, as they collaborated on an award-winning devotional, Why God Matters: How to Recognize Him in Daily Life.  This year, she hopes to share the joy of Lent through her book and the Why God Matters website.

This year, Fabian and Tribute Books are opening the Why God Matters website to faith stories by others, especially Lenten faith stories.  “I believe that Lent, and Lenten vows, can change lives,” Fabian said.  “I’d like to share that hope with others, and the best way is through sharing our stories.”

“God continues to bless me through that Lenten vow,” Fabian said.  “Not only will I cherish having worked with my father, but the book itself has touched so many lives.  People have written to us that it’s helped them understand their faith better , brought them closer to God, or touched them when they really needed it.  I hope this Lent, through the website, we can do this some more.”

— 7 (Picture, As Promised) —

When she got her hair cut earlier this week, my seven-year-old asked the beautician to do her hair up. This is my glimpse at how quickly time passes…

Conversion Diary has more Quick Takes…though most people do them on Fridays…